Tuesday, November 13, 2007

How music ruins my life!

So I have a confession ... music can make or break me!
In high school I LIVED with my lovey dovey county music! I was constantly wrapped up in the fantasy world of romance that the songs promised me! I was deceived into thinking that's how it works in the real world! Prior to getting saved I thought that's how life was! I thought that was how it really happened ... for those girls who deserved it ... those girls who were worthy ... pretty enough ... special enough! I let those lyrics consume my thoughts, my emotions, my life! I let the fact that my life didn't mirror those make me feel unworthy and unloved! I let it affect my self esteem and my value!

Once I got saved, my eyes were open to the LIES satan was using in that music! I do not believe that music in and of itself is bad. I just know that it is a weakness for me! I know that it IS a HUGE temptation for me to put myself back in that fantasy world!
Recently I got to see that God is not through working on me in that area! I started listening to this CD ... Colbie Calliet. The song i first listened to was cute and catchy and a little lovey! BUT after listening to the WHOLE cd I found another song that fit how I felt and magnified it 100 times! Every time I listened to it my feelings intensified, I thought it was ok cause this song was singing about it ... it made me feel good! UGH! Sick! Inside I knew that the music was trying to make me fill that DEEP VOID, DEEP LONGING that GOD is supposed to fill! NOT this world, not some boy, not some emotion! UGH! I haven't been able to listen to #7! I don't want to let that song, that music, this world convince me that anything other GOD can fill me! I wonder if GOD sings that song thinking the same thing but about me ...
Take time to realize,
that your warmth is.
Crashing down on in.
take time to realize,
That I am on your side
If you just realize
what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other
and will never find another

Hmmm .... Thinking about it that way is cool ... considering it as God singing it to me ... WOW!I mean I wonder if He gets frustrated and is like KAREN!!! Wake up! I love you! I need you to realize you are so special to me, so precious! You ARE perfect in me, not in some boy! realize KAREN realize ...

2 comments:

Unknown said...

KAREN!!! I LOVE YOUR AMAZING GOD-ISMS!!!
Again- with the voice of reason...

I am so sorry that I had to be the one to bring that sick oey gooey lovey dovey music into your life... Music really is sooo moving and it gets to me like it does to you- more than most other things!
But praise the Lord that He allowed you to see that and so now you dont have to hate #7 and cringe every time you hear it, you can sing it to God... you can turn what the world makes out to be so selfish and unholy into something beautiful and lovely.

I love you!!!

Oh, I got this new cd the other day... i want you to listen to it... lol, but its no #4 or #7... its in Spanish, so now we can listen to it, but not really even know what its saying!! Its great!! HAHA and it is acutally pretty good! :)

Unknown said...

how's that for commenting on your blog!! :)