Well its been a while! School has kept me from blogging. But alas I found a few minutes to squeeze in a blog. This last week has been insane for me. I have been brought to my knees more times than I can count. I have just been in constant prayer all week. Sometimes it takes a week like this to make you realize how much you need God! Nothing major or really bad happened to me. Just enough inconviences and annoying things to make you wanna scream! Or cry ... which I also did alot of. God has to teach us to be more like Him. And this was definatly a teaching moment for me. I try to handle everything on my own. I HATE asking people for help and I don't like when I cant do it on my own. Why can't I just give it to God? This week there were several times when I had to ask for physical help! No fun for me. I didn't know how to change a tire ... so I HAD to ask for help. Its a very humbling thing to do for someone like me. Even something as small as helping change a tire. I dont want to to inconvience others sometimes, well usually, but God says in Galatians 6:2 we are to "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ". He COMMANDS us to help each other. When you look at it like that, by not leaning on others I am being disobeient! Ouch! I know God is gonna help me to lean on Him and my Brothers and Sisters, no matter how scary it is! This tire thing is just a small step in the right direction! When I need helping kicking Satan's butt in the sin areas of my life I will hopefully be able to go to a brother or sister and ask for accountability, i will be able to confess sin! All in good time! I just have to LET GO!!! We sang a song a few weeks in church that brought me to tears!
Deliver me when I try it on my own
Deliver me when pride puts me on your throne
Deliver me when I dont close my eyes to see
Deliver me from me
Until my life mean nothing
and you are all I need
I have definatly sang that song many times before. But Gods good and that song was just what I needed to hear! I had never really listened to those words, I just went thru the motions of singing! I nevere really understood the impact, the truth of it. Its like that with a lot of songs, Christian or not. We just sing them and dont really mean them, dont fully understand what they are about and the message they offer!
So my advice: STOP and LISTEN to those worship songs you have sang over and over! MEAN what you sing! Dont be afraid to lean on others AND God! Just go out there and LOVE!